On Mother's Day, I made biscuits and gravy at my house, roused the kids, and we took two separate cars over to my parents house. I woke up at 5am to do my daily routine that I do every day except Saturday -when I sleep in- usually that means I sleep until maybe 6am, but I like having a morning that feels free like that. I was also feeling good, and happy that I have this morning routine that is such a huge support to me.

It might seem small, but these little gestures of care and support are the things that build an inner knowing. They make it easier to understand ourselves, and to hear all the parts of our lives. When we don't dismiss ourselves, we don't feel dismissed! Our needs and wants then become a whole idea that has shape, texture, and substance rather than being one arbitrary decision after another.

I rely on my brain to explain the world to me because sensing the world is so..much. It's why it seemed reasonable to use my brain to...

This sounds like such a small thing. But for me, a decision like this is difficult. It is so ingrained in me to not do anything that will garner attention that something as unremarkable as turning off my camera during a co-writing session can cause me distress. It feels wrong for me to change what I'm doing midstream in a other-people-can-see-me situation. It really tells me how closely I pay attention to what other people might think.⁠

Because we live in a world that doesn't accommodate how our brains work, we don't learn how to operate our brains.

I didn't know that I was working so hard on getting well that I wasn't ever BEING WELL.