I've spent a lot of my life trying to get it right and wondering why everyone else seemed to know something I didn't. I knew there were things I should do, should want, should be, but a lot of those things never made much sense to me. I spent most of my life hearing about how much potential I had and fighting to find my place in the world.

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I've always felt different from other people, I just didn't know why. I was identified as gifted as a kid, and then in 2024 I discovered I'm ADHD and autistic. That discovery helped me understand that I hadn't been failing at life. I'd been trying to be someone I wasn't.

 

It was a relief to have some explanation for why I'd always felt different. But the bigger shift has been what I've done with that information. Since then, I've been moving from managing myself to being in a relationship with myself.

 

The reason I became a coach is because I wanted to help people be more comfortable with themselves. In 2016, I was planning to go back to school to become a therapist when a friend sent me an article about life coaching. As soon as I read it, I knew: I wanted to be a coach.

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Being a coach was right for me because I'm more interested in getting curious with people than having the answers for them. I like looking at the norms, rules, and systems we've inherited and wondering whether they still make sense. 

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I've been sober since 2012. Not drinking became the backbone of my life, and I ended up creating my own unconventional approach to sobriety and recovery. I've never had a typical 9-to-5 career, and I never got a degree, although I've taken a frankly ridiculous number of classes. I'm an independent scholar and lifelong learner, which mostly means I'm always reading something, taking a class, following a question, or changing my mind about something I thought I understood.

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I'm usually reading, writing, making art, sewing, backpacking, and being outside. I love talking about humanity, life, work, leadership, nature, ideas, and systems. I love learning about people and what it's like to be them.

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I'm 55 years old, queer, white, able-bodied, and I live in Durham, North Carolina, with my family and two cats.